Boys drive cool cars because we like cars, and because we like girls. We love catching the eye of the hottest girl at school, work, wherever.
Then, when we find the woman of our dreams and get into a relationship with her, we are surprised to discover a hidden truth: Integrity is more attractive to women than engines. Weird.
To be attractive, she may like your style, but that isn’t what she actually wants. She wants to find out who you are on the inside. Regardless of what we think or what she says, she’s really not that into the hot car or motorcycle or your style as much as she’s waiting to hear words that express your character—the real “you.”
Sure, women want to marry a man who has a car ... and a job. But words are even more important. Your words reveal your heart.
The singer-songwriter Darlene Zschech said in a conversation one day, “When men worship, women feel safe.”
Whether married or single or dating or not ... this is a word for you.
I believe what Darlene said is true because when men pray or sing or worship God, there is an honesty attached to it. Being honest meets a woman’s need for security.
When a man is honest, when he has proven integrity, the woman in his life feels secure. When she feels secure, she can open her heart. An open heart is the pathway to true intimacy.
Truth produces trust. Trust opens intimacy.
Most men want a woman’s heart to open when he gives her something, or does something heroic, or his clothes match, or he works out and gets a bit ripped. That might get her attention, but the heart-opening characteristic of honesty attracts the kind of woman you build a lifelong relationship with, and is the bedrock of marriage.
